Firestorm Armada

Hi Kids, Now this is all top secret hush-hush type stuff, taking place at an undisclosed location way on back in the never-never. Had to navigate using the stars while blindfolded to get there. It's so far out past the black stump that they don't even have pizza delivery out there. The mosquitos have four engines! I had to use my cell phone to take these pictures, as the normal digital camera was banned due to the double top secret classification of the event. This was the first "local" game of Firestorm Armada we've played. Had two fleets, the Anal Probes vs. the Tadpoles. This shot is of the most daring-do event of the game, when my Tadpole Frigate the "Treefrog" cut across the path of the Anal Probe Battleship "Large Colon," guns blazing away to all get-out!!! On three dice I managed to do 9 hits!!! Due to a "6" causing two hits and getting a re-roll at the same time. Needless to say, I would have rather won the lottery with odds of this sort, but you gotta take what you can get. The only fly in the oinment was the "Large Colon"'s defense rating reducing my splendid attack to one stinkin' damage point. Oh well, you can't have everything.

Here's the set-up the turn prior to the "Treefrog"s epic attack. On the left are the sadistic forces of The Anal Probes; looks like two cruisers, a battleship, and a few frigates; facing on the right the Tadpole Navy; a carrier, two cruisers, a handful of frigates, and a battleship way off in the background.

Your humble correspondent, wearing suitable birth control device. (No woman would come near a guy wearing a hat like that. Effectiveness at 100%) An added bonus: it also conceals my double sexy new haircut.

The gamer to be named later: He's got two games under his belt this year, watch out! He's on a rampage!!

Not only does this gamer command the Anal Probe fleet, he doesn't like Bruce Springsteen. Does anyone have any surplus personality we can loan this guy? Maybe we can set up a toll free number for him.

Over all I liked the game a lot; it's not just fleets trading alpha strikes in a high speed pass, these ships can take a lot of damage until somebody really gets lucky and then things can happen really fast. The big Correllian ships dominate the game, but that's how it should be when the Dreadnoughts and Battleships come out to play! I'm going to have to decide which fleet to pick up myself. Guess I'll be heading to the Spartan Games website after finishing this report.

So how did the game turn out? I'd call it a draw, with just maybe a Tadpole leaning. Each fleet still had a heavily damaged Battleship at the end, and the Tadpoles had a heavily damaged Carrier and some fighters still on the board; but it was after 10:00pm, it looked like rain, the bunyips in the river were calling out their sorrow to the uncaring moon, and we still had to navigate our way home.